DEI Advisors & Marriott International Celebrate International Women's Day 2023 with Rachel Humphrey & Karen Finberg

DEI Advisors and Marriott International host this special edition in celebration of International Women's Day. Rachel Humphrey and Marriott's Former Chief Franchise Officer, Karen Finberg, discuss their paths to leadership and how the lessons they've learned along the way have influenced their leadership styles and personal growth over time, They talk about common themes among leaders interviewed by DEI Advisors and share their own strategies for overcoming challenges, wellness, relationship building, support systems, their personal mantras, and more.

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Rachel Humphrey 0:00

I am Rachel Humphrey with D e I advisors, and I am very excited today to launch a special edition of D E I advisors, along with Marriott International in celebration of International Women's Day 2023. I wanna thank Karen Finberg and the entire Marriott team for this opportunity to celebrate such an important day together. Karen Finberg is the Chief Franchise Officer at Marriott Inter. And we're gonna spend a little bit of time together today. Karen, welcome to the show. Thanks,

Karen Finberg 0:29

Rachel. I'm thrilled to be here and I can't think of anybody better to be celebrating this day with I just love your story and love all of our relationship that we've had together. You are just a perfect partner to talk about international Women's Day and embracing. maybe the best place to start, and I know we're changing things up a bit, where we're interviewing each other and both of us professed that we like to be the interviewer, not necessarily the very true interviewee. So both of us will get comfortable together doing this. But maybe the best place to start, Rachel, if you don't mind, is tell us about your career and how it led you to d e i advisors and the really important work that you're doing.

Rachel Humphrey 1:14

Yeah, absolutely. My path here is very different than a lot of other people's. I grew up in a very small town in New Hampshire. At one point I wanted to be a Dallas cowboy cheerleader, or a long haul trucker. I I think that was really a means to an end a way of seeing the country in a way that I otherwise couldn't imagine. Were you a cheerleader in high

Karen Finberg 1:36

school?

Rachel Humphrey 1:37

No, I was not. We only got one TV channel and it always had the Cowboys on. Okay. So it seemed like a very glamorous career tv. There you go. But somewhere along the line, I decided I wanted to be a lawyer. I don't know why. I didn't know any, had never had a reason for one. I'm guessing it's probably LA Law or some other TV influence at the time. But I went to law school and I had a really exceptional 20 years as a trial lawyer. I loved every minute of it. I think. Good at it. I represented a lot of small to mid-size businesses doing a lot of different things, including a lot of hotels and restaurants. I developed a franchise practice along the way there, and somewhere along the line, I just didn't love the law anymore. I didn't love what I was doing, and I had never had a a job that I, I didn't envision myself in forever. I used to joke that you were gonna, I was gonna die in a courtroom and you'd have to wheel me out. And so it was really a lot to take. I think there were a lot of reasons in hindsight. One might have been becoming apparent. But I, we had a call very late on a Friday night from our nanny at the time, and she said that she was moving on to a job that would give her health insurance, and I said to my husband, I have another idea. I think I had never looked for a job with a job. I had been at one firm in northern Virginia, and then when we moved to Atlanta, I had been at another firm that whole time. I couldn't imagine being loyal in other things of actually looking for work, and I didn't know what it was I wanted to do, and I said, I think I would like. To give notice on Monday, which was terrifying. Wow. We were not set up for it financially or otherwise. We told the girls over the weekend, they thought it was a terrible idea. They said, what if we do a two week trial run and you're our nanny for two weeks? And then if we don't like it, we sent you, see how it work again. See how it goes. But we did in fact, and I spent the next six months really digging deep. What was it I wanted to do? Did I wanna be a trial lawyer? Did I wanna go in? I had a real interest in trying to figure out something in nonprofit space, but at the time, most nonprofits don't have budgets to have a general council, and I was visiting with a woman who was the executive director of a charitable association that my daughter was very engaged with. And she said, I don't know if you know this, but I used to be a trial lawyer and I didn't know it. And she said, there are so many still skills in common between being a trial attorney and this association universe. I think you would be great at it. And so I went home and I. Did a little research and I thought, gosh, this is incredible. I'd never even heard the word association executive before. And in my looking for nonprofit opportunities, I came across an offering from a HOA that I knew very well through my law firm days of representing hoteliers and speaking at conferences about franchise work. And they were looking for an entry level franchise specialist. And I realized that I had a really unique skill in that area and the knowledge of the me. So I reached out to Chip Rogers, who is then the president of a HOA and the HR team, and I said, listen I'm totally unqualified, overqualified, not unqualified, overqualified for what you're looking to do, but I think I have a really unique skill. And to his credit, they created. An incredible opportunity for me. So in 2015, I became the Vice President of franchise relations at Ahaa. I quickly rose to Chief operating Officer and also served as president and c e O of Ahaa for a period of time. And then I retired in 2021 as the executive Vice president and c O of Ahaa after an incredible time there where I learned so much and built incredible relationships and fell in love with a completely different aspect of hospital. In my retirement, I thought I was done a complete clean break. And in a moment I started seeing some announcements that didn't feel great about the lack of women being elevated to senior executive and C-Suite roles in hospitality, and realized that I was in a position, both because of the relationships I had, but also some other opportunities to perhaps spend some time doing that. So I'm now the proud founder of the Women in Hospitality Leadership Alliance, which is 29. Incredible organizations in hospitality really dedicated to elevating women into leadership. And then David Kong invited me to join his new initiative of d e I advisors, where we get the opportunity to empower personal success by sharing these stories of industry leaders like yourself, about your journey and your path to leadership. And so it is the perfect platform for me to take the opportunity, the access. Unimaginable careers that I have had, and now try to offer that same advice and counsel to the next generation or even to those already in leadership by continuing to inspire through those stories. So that is my path to today. And I know, Karen, yours and your rise to chief franchise officer is very different than mine. Tell us a little bit about your sense, maybe some of the inflection points that you've touched on along the.

Karen Finberg 6:29

Great. People might be surprised to know that at Marriott, roughly 88% of our hotels are franchised. This was honestly when I started my hotel career. I had no idea or very little knowledge about franchising. I. I started off quite unconventionally. I or my career has been very unconventional. I started off on property doing kind of the typical hotel jobs that people have, front desk and catering and event management. And then went into sales. I worked a lot of hours and I saw the kinds of hours that salespeople were working. I said, that's for me, So I went into sales and. Spent about 20 years in sales in a variety of roles in the managed arm of our Marriott organization. I got to a regional level and oversaw 47 hotels in the eastern region. At the time, we were reorganizing our sales organization, and I also saw that there weren't many women out in the field as general managers. So I went to my boss at the time and I. I think you need more women general managers and you need women general managers that know sales and marketing, cuz that's what owners are looking for today. Why don't you just take a chance on me? And three months later I was the resident manager at the JW Marrit in Washington dc So very fortunate that I had a leader that saw really my potential. It wasn't that I brought a huge amount of knowledge, but I think he saw the potential. And then from there, Several operations jobs, two general manager jobs. And then again, a twist of fate. I got a call about coming into our franchising organization and it for select brands. So two things I really. Did not know much about franchising for sure, and select brands as well since I had done the full service side. But I took a chance. It was interesting. It was a growing part of our business. I took a chance on it and someone took a chance on me and it was wonderful. I learned a lot about our owner world and how Marriott grows and a lot about msb. And during that time we launched AC hotels, which was really a lot of. From there, I went into, back to our managed organization. I was area vice president. I had 230 hotels in the eastern region. So about 8,000 associates. And a large team that led those hotels. So a lot of learnings there. And then back to franchise again. Rachel, that's where you and I met. Yes. working together. And then from there today chief Franchise Officer, so very lucky

Rachel Humphrey 9:10

and so many incredible lessons in that about advocating for yourself to say you were interested, having a champion who saw the potential in you taking risks and doing different things. Just so many themes we hear about regularly in that path to leadership. That's an incredible story. And with Marriott, for how long now?

Karen Finberg 9:31

I'm, I think, well by adoption I started with Stouffer Hotels, then Renaissance, then Marriott. I think I'm right at 35 or just over 35 years. Is that not untypical for Marriott, but Yeah. Amazing. I think this is One of the wonderful things about the hotel business and Marriott, I would say specifically, is that if you have a quest to learn and you've got you're open-minded really the world is your oyster. So I've been very lucky.

Rachel Humphrey 9:58

That's fantastic. Yeah. We're gonna turn a little bit to the theme of this year's International Women's Day of Embracing Equity. Tell us a little bit about your experience as a woman in business. Has that changed over that 35 years, and what advice would you give to other women coming up through the hospitality industry?

Karen Finberg 10:21

Well, Rachel, I, it's just even hard to believe that when I started working, women couldn't wear pants to work and we had to wear pantyhose. It's when you think about today and where we started, I remember I used to go out on sales calls and wear pants where nobody could tell that that I wasn't wearing a full suit. But every, everything has changed tremendously over time. I am just either I was naive or overly confident or any of those things, but I really forged forward not really thinking about gender to be honest. I looked at the positions that I wanted and knew that through hard work and most importantly results I just had this belief that good things would come and. And that did happen. I'm fortunate, but it also happened because along the way there were people who saw potential in me and open pathways for the next thing that could come. So it was really a combination of two things. I was good at problem solving and delivering results and building relationships and found myself in the right place at the right time for whatever the next opportunity would. I guess my advice would be is just to be. Open-minded. Be authentic to yourself. And trust and trust in yourself and be confident that even what you don't know, you'll figure out. And if you've done a good job and other jobs, you'll do a good job in your next job. So it's really about having confidence in yourself for the next step forward.

Rachel Humphrey 11:59

and I think that's something that you and I have had in common. We have talked about how coming up we didn't seem to be deterred by being the only woman in a lot of rooms. We didn't set out to be advocates for other women. I think I've been very honest with you to tell you as a lawyer, I actually didn't wanna be known as a female trial lawyer. It made me feel, for whatever reason that I needed special treatment in some way. And so I. Joined the women's bar. I wasn't active in the female lawyers associations. when I got to hospitality on the association side, I same plan. I had not certainly intended that this would be the path that I would take now, but the minute that my title had a C in front of it, I did start to receive calls, whether it was from the trade publications or from conference speaker sourcing. Because there were so few of us, it wasn't that I was the best person for it, it's that there were not a lot of women. And that was very surprising to me and gave me an opportunity maybe a responsibility, although I don't know that I viewed it that way at the time, but an opportunity to have a different audience than I'd had before. And I think having two. One 17 and 1 21. Now I really saw a chance to try to advocate for something important that they would then see that you don't have to be limited in any way by your gender. And that was really for me, the start through that access through those relationships through having tremendous champions like you have had. that I really found my way into this capacity that I hadn't set out to find. And to my surprise, it's now my best chapter yet it really has been an incredible opportunity for me. As far as advice goes, I would say that everyone out there you should dream. I never dreamed. I didn't know that I could dream to have the kind of careers that I have had to have the type of relationships and the satisfaction in those careers that I've had, but also to dream your dreams authentic to you. you can't follow my path and I don't want you to live my dreams or Karen's dreams. But really to say, you know what, I'm gonna dream big, but I'm gonna really stay true to myself and my values and be authentic to me. And I think that combination can just take you to incredible. And that

Karen Finberg 14:15

takes a lot of fortitude. I think you and I probably didn't have a lot of women around us as our career grew to go to today. I'm like you, I do feel that responsibility, and actually I have a passion for it is to, is to be available and to women to help them think about their careers and their path forward. But I don't recall. We talk about networking. I don't recall really having a network. You just did the work and and the next thing happened. And fortunately I think if you did the work well and you had a good reputation, good things happen. And those things still apply today. Regardless, I, at the end of the day, it is about the work that you do and how you conduct yourself in the world. That is what's going to open doors for you going forward. Absolutely. Yeah. Rachel, you we talked about leadership, but you've interviewed hundreds. Of people. And for anyone on the Marriott side that is listening to this, please go to the d e i advisor's site. You'll see all of Rachel's interviews with great women leaders all with different stories. But what are some of the common themes that have emerged on how leaders have approached their career paths and what. Would you give them, I know you talked a little bit about it now, but as you've, what, from what you've heard, what seems to be common

Rachel Humphrey 15:42

themes? First of all, it's been an incredible opportunity for me to sit down with so many incredible leaders, male and female, and really hear about their paths to leadership like you and I are doing today, and talking about those lessons that are learned. And I continue to be inspired as they are from each other as we continue to share these stories. Storytelling is such an impactful, motivator for us and such a great way to empower success. I think I would pick three. I've heard a lot of recurrent themes. One is, as we talked about at the very beginning, that there is no one path to leadership that you can have a path like mine that went through. Law firm life and then association life and now into a nonprofit volunteer space. You've had a lengthy path through various aspects of the hotel industry, and I think that's one of the things that's incredibly special about hospitality. As you listen to each of these leaders talk about their start, no two are the same. And to me, if I can sit back and say, I can be anything, I wanna be in this career and I can do it my way, that's really an exciting industry to be in. That's an exciting path to have. So I would say that's one of them. A second is a recurring theme of curiosity or lifelong learning. I don't know that I would've ever used the phrase curiosity actually before I started doing these interviews, but you hear so many people say you did, I wanted to learn this part of the business, or I wanted to live in a different part of the country. Or I read, or I go to conferences, or I watch a lot of things, or I learn from how others moderate panels, everybody. This incredible desire to continue growing. And I have really loved that. And to the extent that a lot of our listeners are actually other C-Suite leaders who are continuing to learn. And what I realize in that is when you get that c e O title, you don't just decide, I've learned enough, and stop learning. And so that's been a really exciting thing to see this continual theme of lifelong learning and curiosity. And I think the last one has to do with obstacles. We all make mistakes. We all hit setbacks. We all hit days where we're really, the negative self-talk in our head can be much louder than what anyone else is saying. And I think that the. Ability to overcome obstacles to see them as opportunities, a silver linings kind of way that most of the leaders that we talk to really don't get bogged down with a setback. There's a realization that as a leader, you are faced with momentous decisions on a minute by minute basis, and they're not always, you're not always gonna choose the right one. So really that ability to just say, okay, own it. I'm gonna accept this one. I'm gonna learn from it and I'm gonna move on, I think has been a really other important big one. So I would say that those three things the unique path, the curiosity, and then the ability to overcome or see obstacles as opportunities.

Karen Finberg 18:36

Yeah, I I can't, I don't know anyone who's had a career without obstacles. maybe. Tell us about one of yours, Rachel, while we're sharing.

Rachel Humphrey 18:46

I don't, I dunno if I have a specific one. I will tell you that I have a personal mantra that I have lived by for a long time, which is I wake up every day and I wanna be the best I can be at whatever it is I'm doing. If I'm being a mom, a wife, a daughter, a career, A volunteer, whatever, but every day I'm gonna have a challenge. Every day I'm gonna have a setback or something that takes me off course, and all I can do is go to bed and wake up the next day and hope that I've learned something from it. So whatever it is, I think we're all continual works in progress. The other side of that though is that I don't know that I'm guaranteed tomorrow. So I really don't wanna get bogged down in the disappointments. I am I allowed to take a minute and be disappointed. Oh crap. That was a terrible moment, but I really want to figure out the way to take that next step. As far as tackling challenges. I do think it's real, really important to take ownership for them. I think that the minute we say, you know what? Or even my going to you and saying, I messed up here, and then figuring it out. I think where we get into trouble is where we are passing blame or we're not self-aware enough to see the role that we played in it. But I think every obstacle, every challenge becomes a new opportunity, much like the other leaders that I've spoken with. And I don't know that to pinpoint a single. Obstacle as so many of them. That would really be it. I think it, it's this continual idea also of reinventing yourself. Certainly it was an obstacle when I moved from Virginia to Atlanta starting over again in the legal community. I certainly had to overcome challenges of. Building a reputation in an industry. As an association executive where I was very new, I knew a lot of people in the industry in a legal capacity, but I didn't know them in these other capacities. And so really having to start off rebuilding a reputation, which is so important. I think that there's. Just so much to be learned from challenges and learning just to move on from them.

Karen Finberg 20:42

From risk risk is how you grow, but risk also comes with failure. Yeah. So if you want to grow and if you wanna be valuable to a company or make a difference in the world, it is gonna require risk. But with that, and courage, but with that, it not everything is gonna be a win. That's, and so you just hope that you get more goods than bads, But if you're not willing to make that big decision or take that big risk, you'll stagnate. I, that's how I see things is you've just gotta be optimistic and just go for.

Rachel Humphrey 21:19

And that's part of the reason I've always loved the question of what advice would you give to your younger self? because we are all this work in progress. So as we reflect back and we can say, you know what lessons have I learned along the way? I think that reflection is a really important part of leadership. Because that's where you say, oh, you know what? That obstacle did not end up being the end of the world. That obstacle ended up leading to this incredible new opportunity, or this thing that I learned that I've never repeated again. Yeah. Or

Karen Finberg 21:48

jobs that you wanted and didn't get, and then the next thing is something better or different came along. Absolutely. So just trust, is part of it too.

Rachel Humphrey 21:59

Yeah. I mentioned continuous learning as one of the things that we find in common for a lot of our advisors. I know you are a strong believer in personal and professional growth as well. Where do you turn for resources? Are there champions who've helped you along the way? What is your growth process like for you?

Karen Finberg 22:19

I think it's funny that you say curiosity but I am also curious by nature. I learned that from my father who was restless and curious. And so that came to me as well. And I like to learn. I've grown my career by being open to change. and having and being comfortable with being uncomfortable. And I think that is especially for women, I I think women believe or we put the pressure on ourselves that we have to know everything before we go on to our next thing. I believe you have to just know enough. And you'll figure out the parts that you don't know. So I, I've been but that comes with confidence and I have my parents to thank for that and it's confidence, maybe in a little bit naive, but I just have forged. Forged through believing that everything will be okay in the end. And as a result of that, every position has built on the last one, which. It wasn't necessarily planful, but I was able to carry everything into the next position, which led me to, to where I am today. I didn't ever have a formal mentor, but I did have a lot of people I could ask advice, but it wasn't really general advice. It was, I wanna do this. What do you think? Do you think this is a good move or a bad move? Or through the work that I did, doors opened. That might not have otherwise. But I was willing to walk through them. I think that was the important part is willing, if someone's gonna give you an opportunity and it fits you shouldn't let fear get in the way. You should just move forward and do it. And I try to do that today when I see position. That remind me of people, but they may not have thought about it themselves. I'll call and say, Hey, do you know that this position is posted or have you talked to this person? I try to, I'm not probably the best mentor on earth, but I do try to. Make connections or help people solve problems. So one of the things I think, just like you said, is where I get a lot of my enjoyment today is around that, is around the connections and making connections for others to watch them

Rachel Humphrey 24:35

grow. Karen, I think you just said something really interesting there, because I feel similarly about mentorship. I'm not probably a great formal mentor. I'm not a huge proponent of formal mentorship, but I do think that having resources, having champions, often our champions are doing things behind the scenes we don't even know that they're doing. That's right. But when. Those champions come about, it's because of a very grassroots or granular relationship. That you've built as opposed to a formal mentoring. And I'm sure lots of people have different experiences, but I think mine has been similar to yours on that front.

Karen Finberg 25:10

Yeah. I think I have a handful. Of people that have made a big difference in my career. There's no question. So I don't know that they thought that they were mentoring me, to be honest. I don't think that they set out to be my mentors yet. They were very instrumental in my career and I'm grateful. I send them notes to thank them along the way. Sometimes you forget the difference that you've made in someone's life, and when I get notes from those that I've touched, it just. The world to me. Nice. Yeah. So Rachel leaders talk about the concept of having their own personal board of directors, right? This kind of is what we were talking about. What is your support system and how have you identified those?

Rachel Humphrey 25:54

Karen, I'll be honest I have not been great at this in my me neither my ability to reflect now. I was actually telling someone the other day, I wish everyone could retire at 35, take a little bit of time to learn about themselves and then go back to work for the rest of their career. I think part of me felt that because I'm very driven by service to others that. if I had a challenge or I needed a support system, I was already overwhelming someone who was already overwhelmed. Or my I don't, I just didn't wanna add to other people's, or I don't like talking about myself. Yeah. Yeah. Contrary to what it looks like today. So I think that I did not do a great job in identifying or maximizing the true value of a support system. I would be remiss to say I had a nanny the entire time. My children were younger. I could not have done it without her. My husband has been a great support system. I've had colleagues that have built me up and picked me up when I needed it. I had an executive assistant that when I realized that it was okay to rely on somebody else. Changed the entire course, not just of my life, but of my career. Yeah. Because she has been a superstar for me. But I definitely didn't lean in well to the idea of a support system in my retirement. I have learned that. We really I draw so much inspiration and motivation from being around others. And it isn't one way in any way. The group of people that I spend my time with now are all people I've known for a long time, but would not have been my strongest support system. and it may be elder care, or it may be. What retirement is like or about to be an empty nester or other things that I can really lean into them and try to rely on advice. And as far as identifying, it depends what I'm looking for. Do I want someone to make me laugh? I have a laugh person. Do I wanna vent to someone I have that? Do I need a hug? Do I need someone to call me out on my bs? Sometimes I just need someone to say Hey, enough already. So it really depends for me. But now at this stage of my life, I can't imagine not having this support system. I have a group of women I walk with on a regular basis, my husband, my family good friends, colleagues, others in the industry that have turned out to be sounding boards for me as I go through this next chapter. And I do. I love the idea. Personal board of directors. I've actually, since the article came out about it a couple years ago, I've forgiven it a lot of thought, and I think it's really shaped that it's okay to lean in to others. It doesn't make me Selfish in any way. It doesn't mean that I can't also be there for other people. And so having a support system around me, and I do hear this from a lot of the leaders that we've interviewed they identify their support systems all in very different ways. Some industries, some families, some outside industries, all over, all walks of life. But I think that's one where I'm still a work in progress, but I was not good. Maximizing it during most of my professional career.

Karen Finberg 28:57

And I wonder as we think about men and their support systems, right? It just looks very different than women and their support systems. I think about, for men it may be around golf or another way. I think women have just a different. Way of speaking to each other and supporting each other, that that is very honest and it's, yeah I'm just, I'm like you. This group of women coworkers and women friends is critical to my wellbeing. There's no question.

Rachel Humphrey 29:26

I think also I call it kind of the hamster wheel of life. As you're going through your career and you're growing and you're having a family and maybe you're moving and you've gotta take care of your house and your pet and your parents and all of these other things I think sometimes it's hard to remember to take care of ourselves and a support system. I know we're gonna talk about wellness in a little bit, but I think a support system becomes one of the most important ways we take care of ourselves. But it tends to get. As women as we're tending to all of the other things on the hamster wheel. Yeah. In any given day. Relating to that is advocating for ourselves. I mentioned that we tend to put ourselves last. There is a generalization that women are not good at advocating. You mentioned earlier saying, raising your hand and saying, I'm interested in this, which is an incredible. Thing to hear. Do you think generally you do a good job advocating for yourself? And what advice would you give to somebody who thinks, you know what I'm really not good at or not comfortable with that concept?

Karen Finberg 30:22

Yeah. I think the way I advocate for myself is with passion and conviction, right? And then of course it's gotta be backed up by a good track record. But. I do by embracing things with enthusiasm, showing the love that I have for the work or the people that I do. Yeah. I don't know that's advocacy, but it is about being confident in the work that I do and having passion about the work that I do. There's nothing more powerful I think, than somebody that is passionate and loves what they do. It's, it exudes to others. I try very hard not to be cynical. I think cynical. people are exhausting. They're, it kills ideas. I really try not to be that person. And I think a lot of advocacy comes with is reputation. I just, I, reputation is important and it's important in a large company. Being a good steward of your own reputation, helping others build theirs is really important. So that kind of, precedes your advocacy of yourself if people, if you've created a good reputation. Also it's just about not being afraid to try something new and trusting that you could do it well. And trying to find where things are growing or where risk is needed, and stepping into those roles that also is helpful. And it's really about being a person with integrity and authentic. I have this mantra you talked about yours and when I think about and I'm gonna read this for just a minute, but how what filter when I'm making decisions or how. I wanna operate in the world or be remembered is I have these eight or so things that needed to be core truths for myself. And it is love what you do. And you said this, Rachel, when you stopped loving what you did, you had to make a change. If not, it's soul crushing, right? Yes. So you have to love what you do. you try to be who you admire, right? Who and emulate those that you admire. One that I believe, especially during the pandemic, is control what you can control, right? Worrying, endless worrying is no bueno, right? Just try to focus on those things that you can control and let the others go live to learn. We talked about learning and really trying to energize people around me, and that comes with coming. in with a good head on my shoulders and being enthusiastic about the work to be done. And then really as we think about the pandemic or making hard decisions is making sure that we do no harm. I try to make, these are all the filters. Am I making things better? Are these decision making things better? Am I being respectful of others? Am I being kind? And I think One thing in women's leadership is, and especially after you get to a certain point or you've dotted enough I and crossed enough Ts, is that you can really let your loving self come out. I really try to be as open and authentic and warm as I can be as a leader. Some in my youth may have thought of that as weakness. Today I actually think it's strength. The ability to be vulnerable, admit that you've made a mistake, ask hard questions, allowing that vulnerability is actually a strength. I.

Rachel Humphrey 33:59

And how incredible, first of all to actually have this it's

Karen Finberg 34:04

a little frame. It's a frame, and it's gone to every office that I've ever worked in since I was

Rachel Humphrey 34:10

young. I love it so much. And you know what it is, you actually touched on it when you were starting to talk about that, when you were talking about your reputation. We hear so much about a personal brand now, and it's a phrase that's new, but the concept has been around forever. who do you wanna be and who do you want people to know you as? And that is that reputation. And as you lay out all of those things, you are all of those in my thank you experience with you. I aspire to be those things. So it's

Karen Finberg 34:37

really different parts of it at different

Rachel Humphrey 34:39

times. Yeah. I had someone actually that you and I know in common that we are both very fond of, told me in one of the d e I advisor's interview, I am the blank brand, putting his name in there. And he said, I think about that in every interaction I have is does this interaction live up to my personal brand? Because no one can own my brand but me. And I loved that so much because as you're saying, this reputation of who you are and who you want to be. will be so incredibly impactful along the way. And so I love that you've been very intentional about what you want that to be.

Karen Finberg 35:17

I've tried so we just, we were talking about networking and Yeah. Interestingly when you and I spoke, we said that during like our career I'm still in my. Primary career. Yeah. And when you were in your last one that we weren't great networkers and this idea of networking just seemed like another job maybe. Yeah. But talk to me a little bit about networking, because I, some of the things that you've told me is as you finished. with a HOA and went on to this work. Talk to me a little bit about the networking.

Rachel Humphrey 35:53

Yeah, I think that first of all, people are very surprised to hear that I am terrified to walk into a room of people. I don't know. I am never gonna walk up to someone and say, hi, I'm Rachel, and start talking. It's never, I'd rather hide in the bathroom. You are interview.

Karen Finberg 36:08

Hundreds of people that's control.

Rachel Humphrey 36:10

Control, very different setting. And the same was true as a lawyer. I didn't wanna go to, I wasn't gonna be a rainmaker, I wasn't gonna go to conferences and strike up conversation with strangers. But what I have learned, again in this very reflective period, I thought everybody in hospitality had the relationships that I had. And what I have learned is, Everybody knows everybody, but it doesn't mean they have the relationship. So when I call someone and say, Hey, I'd love to interview you for d e I advisors, they pick up the phone number one, and they say yes, number two. And so I started to think, why is that? Why? Why did I not see? And it was because I didn't think of it as networking. I think of it as maximizing relationship building in a way that works for my person. I love to travel. I wanna know the last place you were and where you've been, and if you tell me you're going somewhere great for spring break, a week after spring break, I'm gonna email you and ask you how it was. I wanna know about your kids. I will tell you, I've got two seniors, one graduating from high school, one graduating from college. I wanna know. what your kids are up to. Is it sports? Is it the arts? Is it something else? Do you have a child with some sort of disability and how is that progressing? So I just am so interested in people, sports teams. Most people know who I root for. I'm not a secret about it. I wanna, I might text you after a big game Hey, big game, even if I didn't watch it. I know that's important to you. And so I have really found that my relationships have come. in part from being genuinely interested in other people. So that's number one. Number two, I'm really good at following up. So if I tell you I'm gonna do something, as you know from our interactions together, yes, I know, yeah, I'm going to do it. And whether I meet you for the first time and I connect with you on LinkedIn and I send you an email, my brand who a lot of people is the handwritten note. I haven't done it as much in retirement, but there are people who will pull out. Stack of them because I wrote you a note saying it was great to meet you. I look forward to collaborating with you in the future. And people find that handwritten note, so memorable because not many people do it anymore. So I have my mother to thank who made me, turned me into an obsessive thank you note writer that has now become this personal note. If someone got a promotion, writing a note, a handwritten note, not a text, not an email to congratulate them. So that becomes part because then people remember me. Time that I see them. But I also don't build relationships to get anything out of them. I don't go to you and say, I'm gonna get to know Karen because I need something from Karen or from Marriott. What I do is I build my relationship and then should. our paths have a way that you might be able to do something helpful to me. I can call on you, but I love to end every conversation, as is there anything I can do for you? Because I want people to know that I'm not in it for me, and that really does help me build a lot of these genuine relationships. I'm not gonna be on the golf course. I'm not gonna be at the cigar bar. I'm not gonna be at the bar till two in the morning. I might be there till 11, but I'm not gonna be there till two in the morning. Not that's the only places that relationships are built, but I really realized that I could build incredibly deep personal relationships in a way that suited my personality and felt very authentic to me. It was just gonna be different than how somebody else might build that relationship. And now I'm getting to see. At this chapter of my life that without setting out to network, I have built this incredible network. And so for me it's the opposite way of looking at it. I get the benefit now of hindsight, of seeing how I did it without realizing I was doing it at the time. And how that.

Karen Finberg 39:48

Actually, if you didn't have that network that was unin, it was not done intentionally. You couldn't really be doing what you're doing today, your next

Rachel Humphrey 39:56

Oh, absolutely. Not, yeah, not just calling leaders to ask them to be a part of the show, but the Women in Hospitality Leadership Alliance came from an idea where originally I was gonna volunteer some time and I reached out to a couple of relationships I had. In those conversations, I realized that I might be onto something of this collaboration idea. but I was able to reach out to people to say, I have an idea. Would you humor me with one phone call where we all get on a call together? And it was magical from the get-go. But that was because those people, I had a reputation, I had relationships with those leaders and they were willing to jump on a call when I asked them if they would consider jumping on a call. So no question. But this chapter would be completely different for me if I had not been so successful along the way in that regard, even though. I wouldn't consider that a strong suit during any of those years. So it was a

Karen Finberg 40:48

byproduct maybe. Yeah. Yeah. So I, this idea of LinkedIn. So I'm a just a question for you. So on LinkedIn Yeah. My LinkedIn network, it's big, but it's people I know. Yeah. Like it I know them. So it's not like this, it's not a networking place for me, even though it's big and I actually don't do much on LinkedIn. What is your point of view of LinkedIn, just out of curiosity?

Rachel Humphrey 41:11

Until this chapter, I only connected with people I knew there were not there were very few exceptions to that. I did intentionally connect to everybody I knew. So if I was on. An advisory board with a lot of people. Even if I didn't know them, I would connect to them. If you and I were communicating and you added some other people to the communications, I would connect 'em. Okay. But I had some degree of connection to every single person that I was linked

Karen Finberg 41:37

into. The Kevin Bacon connections. Yes.

Rachel Humphrey 41:41

Yeah. So when people called me and said, do you know the answer was always yes. It might take me a minute to remember how, but it's always. The last year or so with the Women in Hospitality Leadership Alliance and some other things, I have had some people ask to connect to me and to follow me so that they can see where I am engaging in elevating women. And so I have, I make sure that we have a commonality of that, whether it is other women who are leading organizations that maybe, I don't know, but I, for the most part, my connection is, my connections are very personal to me.

Karen Finberg 42:16

Okay. Rachel, I know we're coming close to the end, but let's let's focus on really something that's really important, which is wellness. Yeah. Look, if the pandemic taught us anything, it was about wellness in self-care. What did you learn during the pandemic about that and how are, how do you, what do you do today to balance and make sure that you're taking care of?

Rachel Humphrey 42:40

Yeah. What became evident, I won't say during the pandemic, because I was self-aware enough to know that it was before the pandemic, is that I had really lost my way in self-care. much like that hamster wheel. The first thing that went was anything that was taking care of me and what I realized. So I think the pandemic gave us an opportunity to reset. And I will say it was completely circumstantial. I wasn't traveling for work. The kids didn't have activities. I was at home all of the time. There were just ways that I could say, I've said I'm going to do this and I've run out of excuses for why I can't. So that opportunity to reset, I think became very important. But what I have realized and I, my advice to my younger self, which always used to be one thing, and in my retirement has become. all about wellness is that self-care should be non-negotiable. When I think about it, what it means is me also, it doesn't mean only me. It doesn't mean me first. It just means that for my lantern to shine bright, I have to be fueled. And so like you, I have a list and I'm gonna share it. Now I say this all the time. Okay, good. Be the best version of me. What I have realized during pandemic started, but really in retirement, is that habits. along the way can become things that you do every day. So as you begin the process of doing it I hydrate every day. I was terrible at that. Really bad. I eat three meals a day when normal people eat meals during the day. I walk at a minimum of my 10,000 steps every single. I get fresh air. Fresh air is really important to me. And there were a lot of days I would go from the house to my garage, I'd drive to the office, to the garage, into the office, back down and back again. And I would never breathe fresh air. I exercise every day, not for a long time, but I do make time, specific time to exercise. I go to. doctor's appointments, proactive or reactive. But I'm not saying, oh, I don't have time to go to the doctor. I do have a love-hate relationship with sleep. I've talked to a lot of people about it. Oh I'm trying to master it, but it is not letting me, it's elusive. It's very elusive. I go on vacation, which I think is, we should all make time to go on vacation, whatever that looks like, that you enjoy. My family time, which has always been incredibly precious to me, has been built in to. Care and wellness, I'm very present. When I'm present, I put my phone down, I put my computer away. I want to really be in whatever moments that I'm being. I am a proponent of therapy. I think both physical and mental therapy, if you need, and can have a access to something that makes you feel better. I think it's a really great opportunity. And so these are the things for. That I took the opportunity during the pandemic to really kick off, but they've now become a really critical, non-negotiable part of my day, every single day traveling or not. So even now that I'm back a little bit on the conference circuit and other things, I really, I meditate, I forgot to mention that. So I do try to build all of these into a conference schedule, to a vacation schedule, to elder care responsibilities I have down in Florida. And I. A hundred percent the best version of myself right now that I have ever been. So what about you? How about wellness and self Okay. For you? You

Karen Finberg 46:03

were very inspiring there. Let me just, I was probably, ironically my healthiest self probably during the pandemic because it required it you couldn't travel. Time to exercise. I ate better. I have fallen a bit off the wagon. I admittedly and we specifically at Marriott have had a lot of reminders lately about not taking things for granted. We've lost a lot of leaders and a lot of our owner friends. that really, that came out of nowhere or through illness. That should remind us to do all of those things that you just said, Rachel. And sometimes I feel like I'm talking about it like, oh, life is short, but it is a platitude unless you're really going to do something about it and. I am trying to be better at that. I wanna be you on the wellness side, So I'm gonna send you my list. If you send me your list,

Rachel Humphrey 47:11

I will, and I will tell you that I would tell people don't wait until you retire. While I'm grateful that I have this, Opportunity now to really spend a lot of time and the support to spend a lot of time taking care of myself. It is just so important that we do it so much earlier, and I didn't, and again, same type of reasons. I probably thought it was being selfish or I just had too many hamsters on the wheel and I couldn't find, figure it out. And I really wish that I had not let that go at the time. But no such such an important conversation and I think coming out of the pandemic, We as leaders are really embracing our teams as whole people, that we are so much more than the title, than the what we provide at work. Really needing to see people also being their best. And when you are, you're the best contributor, you're best for. So it's a win for everybody in trying to embrace that. And I know Marrianne does a great job about being so supportive of your team and. Building a team that cares deeply about the whole person and taking care of one another and yourself. So that's kudos to you guys for that.

Karen Finberg 48:15

I will say thank goodness for my pandemic dog That does make me walk every day but that's good. Yeah, I do I work out three times a week as well, but the travel, as and it's an excuse. It's just an excuse. Yeah. You'll figure it out. I'll figure it out. That's exactly right. Rachel, you you are inspiring in so many ways. You took I know personally about, How you grew up and the chances that you took and and the decisions that you've made in your career, how you prioritize. For anyone that's thinking about life after their current work, which can be hard to try to imagine what that could look like or to have the confidence to think about what life after work is. You, for me, are an inspiration that there is life after for me, life after Marriott, for any life after whatever position that you're in. If you're just open and learn how to capitalize your skills, which is exactly what you've done.

Rachel Humphrey 49:17

I appreciate that, Karen. You know that you are someone that I admire tremendously, and I was so grateful when our paths crossed and then have continued to cross over the years. D e i advisors is all about empowering personal success, and you certainly stand for that and practice that. in your leadership all of the time. I'm so grateful that Marriott has asked me to spend this really important day celebrating women and women in leadership with you all. And I really thank you and your team, not just for this opportunity, but really all that you do in the hospitality industry to elevate women, to elevate other under. Presented groups into leadership. It's critically important, and Marietta is certainly the leader in that space. So I'm really grateful to be included with you all. And to your audience. And to our audience, happy International Women's Day. We need to continue to, Advocate for change. We need to continue to celebrate and trailblazers that have come before us, influencers who've come before us. But just thank you so much for this incredible opportunity and for inviting d e i advisors to share in it with you. I couldn't have think of

Karen Finberg 50:24

anybody better. So Rachel, thanks for joining us and I can't wait to share this conversation with all of Amazing women at

Rachel Humphrey 50:33

Marriott. So thanks so much, Karen. Thank you. Bye-bye.